Loneliness

I am currently reading a book by Charles Stanley titled, “The Source of my Strength.” The first chapter discusses the “baggage” of loneliness. I don’t think it’s ironic that the very first chapter discusses loneliness. It is an important and often overlooked subject when it comes to baggage that we carry around daily. I would venture to bet that most of us reading this right now have either been lonely recently or feel lonely right now. But loneliness isn’t really something “popular” to talk about, especially among males. But the truth of the matter is we all get lonely. I have been lonely numerous of times while I have been surrounded by plenty of people. So what is it that causes this emotion inside of us, besides the lack of people in our lives? That is a much credited argument if you actually don’t have any people in your life, but everybody has somebody. In a day and age where social media rule our lives and popularity is based on how many “friends” you have following your page, we still struggle with the thought of being alone. Some may be married, have kids, and have a large group of friends or coworkers, and still struggle with loneliness. I wish I had “the cure,” but I do not. Even being a man of faith, I still find times when I am lonely. Often I have found that those times when I am lonely is when I am not spending as much time in my relationship with Christ as I ought to be. In my opinion, there is very much a God shaped hole in our lives that isn’t filled until we begin seeking Him out. Many people seek out many “religious” things, and this isn’t a blog about who is “right” and who is “wrong.” But I have tried a lot of things to fill that void, and have only had peace and the feeling of belonging when I lean into my relationship with Jesus. Now I know some will say, “Well whatever works for you,” and I understand that; I used to say that. But now I look back at the past 34 years of my life and can define the times when life was hardest, and it’s only in those times that I leaned into Christ that I found the most comfort. I recently listened to a message given by Louie Giglio and he spoke about the reason why most people don’t agree with or seek out a relationship with Jesus Christ, and it comes down to control. Knowing that Christ will challenge us to give up control of certain things in our life, keeps us from completely committing our entire life to him. So on the outside we appear as though we are “doing the right thing,” while on the inside we are still extremely lonely. I am not claiming to have all the answers here; Lord knows it has taken lots of time and effort on my part. But if you are lonely, first off, check yourself on where you’re at with your relationship with Christ. If you don’t have one, seek out someone who can help you with that. And second, find people. I am one who is prone to shut people out and feel like I can do fine all on my own. So I am speaking from experience and I will be the first to tell you, that doesn’t work! We were designed for relationships. I also know how destructive and hurtful people can be, but this doesn’t mean you stop finding people to share life with. Don’t let the baggage of loneliness haunt you any longer. It is a painful and extremely dangerous place to be sometimes.